We checked in to the hospital’s surgery center on February
14, 2006….Valentines Day. Where most people were receiving flower deliveries or
making plans for that night’s dinner, he assisted me out of my clothes in to a
hospital gown. I wept and for the first time in our relationship he quietly
consoled me. The excitement that consumed us twenty four hours earlier as we
awaited the fetal doppler to play us the sound of Baby’s heartbeat, turned in
to sadness as the ultrasound confirmed that our child did not have a heart and unbeknownst
to me had stopped growing a week before. How did I not know? As my anger
subsided, sorrow consumed every moment. I wondered at that moment how we could
ever be whole again and although it did not happen overnight Hubs and I began
the healing process. I grew to accept there are some things in life we cannot
begin to comprehend and possibly there was somewhere else he was needed more. I
named him Aidan and although I never met him, I still carry him with me in my
heart.
Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.
Thank you for listening to my story.
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